wondering what was best
the anticipation or the sharing it took forty years to realise
it was the curry sauce. Every week in the 70s we drop
mother at hospital to nurse, back home with two bags of
chips & father's chicken curry from Tam's. In the 90s he
rings to tell me he has one on his knee and it's Thursday
night I say but he knows that. Tam mumbled, father said
you can guess what he's saying or make it up instead in
2005 ... you're back ... not for months ... every time ...
mentions you ... he's always loved your chicken curry
I say. Teenagers queueing with old blokes like the footie,
dole cheap fish chips & curry after a few beers he made
more sense than us. Back home telling stories, father
pretends he can eat a curry. Tam says he's sorry, to say
hello. In 2011 clearing father's house, I order an extra hot,
it's not on the menu, his son looks up and smiles. I tell
him I miss his Dad too. I ask about his mum who still
makes the best curry sauce ever. I can't stop myself
wondering if she's given you the recipe.
SIMON MADDRELL was born in the Isle of Man and raised in Bolton. After twenty years in London, he moved to Brighton & Hove in 2020. He has been published in twelve anthologies and numerous publications including AMBIT, Butcher’s Dog, Stand, The New European, Morning Star, Brittle Star and Dawntreader. Simon was first runner-up in the Frogmore Poetry Prize 2020, shortlisted for Genesis Emerging Writers Programme 2021 and longlisted for the Poetry London Mentoring Scheme 2020. Simon’s debut chapbook, Throatbone, was published by UnCollected Press in July 2020. Queerfella jointly-won The Rialto Open Pamphlet Competition, 2020. In November 2021 Nine Pens Press published All About Our Mothers, an anthology with Vasiliki Albedo and Mary Mulholland.